Baptized

It looks like she has been put through the wringer.  Well...I guess, technically she was.

1213 Holy Baptism is the basis of the whole Christian life, the gateway to life in the Spirit, and the door which gives access to the other sacraments. Through Baptism we are freed from sin and reborn as sons of God; we become members of Christ, are incorporated into the Church and made sharers in her mission: "Baptism is the sacrament of regeneration through water in the word."

A few weeks ago I was concerned about  Catie's conception and birth circumstances.  I was worried that her past might have a negative impact on her future.  I was worried about the evil that may have entered her life through those circumstances.  I was considering how we might be able to bring her to be prayed with.  


Then my brother in law taught be a very important lesson.  Within the Sacrament of Baptism, an actual exorcism is preformed as a part of the ceremony.  Prior to the water washing away all her sins, she is exorcised of any evil spirits. When I learned this I could not wait for April 29th to arrive!!  


Today Catie was baptized into the Catholic Church.  Adopted as a daughter of God.  How cool is that?  Our gotcha day was April 25th.  God's gotcha day was today, April 29th.  :)  I love how He loves us!  \

Baptism is God's most beautiful and magnificent gift. . . .We call it gift, grace, anointing, enlightenment, garment of immortality, bath of rebirth, seal, and most precious gift. It is called gift because it is conferred on those who bring nothing of their own; grace since it is given even to the guilty; Baptism because sin is buried in the water; anointing for it is priestly and royal as are those who are anointed; enlightenment because it radiates light; clothing since it veils our shame; bath because it washes; and seal as it is our guard and the sign of God's Lordship. St. Gregory Of Nazianzus, Oratio 40,3-4:PG 36,361C.

it's official

and forever!

Adoption Day, 20 hours to go!

Maura Catherine...welcome to our family! 

On April 28th of last year I prayed at St Gianna's shrine, on her feast day and with her relics for our family to grow.  One week to the day later I met  you for the first time and fell madly in love.  It was a bit of a roller coaster, but you were truly meant for us.  You have filled our lives with so much joy and love.  We love you and are counting the minutes until 10am tomorrow when it is finally and forever official.  Wednesday you will become a part of our forever family.  Saturday, St Gianna's feast day (April 28th) we will be giving thanks for you.  Sunday, St Catherine of Siena's feast day, we will be baptizing you (on your name's day) and you will forever become a part of God's family. 

XOXOXO
With all our love,
mama & papa

home improvements

With spring in the air and company arriving soon, comes the motivation for home improving.  My first project was powerwashing and restaining our deck and playsets.  I found this great product at Lowes called Restore that made our icky old deck seem like a Trex deck.  It is not cheap (1 gal covers 50 sq ft, versus 1 gal of stain covering 250 sq ft) but I am so happy with the results.  I also slip-proofed the stairs and bridge on the playset by painting them with this prduct as well.

Next.  The Basement.  Finally.  The Basement! 

Our house is forever a work in progress.  It is nice to finally be making some.  Slow by sure.  While my husband worked on studding the wall and doing the electric, I worked on trimming out our fireplace.  This is officially my second wood working project and it is completely addicting.  So many more pinterest possibilities now that I can cut my own wood! 

Taking inspiration from one of my favorite blogs, this is what I am doing with the fireplace.  I still have a bit of work to do, but it is coming along.  I will try to get some actual finished pics up soon!

My next Pinterst project is this fantastic ruler growth chart. 

dear lillie

And then possibly this mat:

from Martha Stewart

Oh...and the garden. Once we have the adoption and party out of the way...the garden needs some love.

the gift of open adoption

Head on over to Foster2Forever to check out my guest post.

The Gift of Open Adoption - even in foster care

our pic...for now

16 days and counting until adoption day!

keeping vigil by candlelight

While life outside is normal and kids are playing on their spring break, inside our home is different.  It is a place of respite.  It is dark and lit only by candlelight.  It is Holy Thursday, we are making space in our lives for the Lord.  We are fasting from artificial light. 

Parenthood is stressful.  The most stressful period of my life thus far.  For me, adolescence was a time of restlessness and rebellion.  Young adulthood was a sort of quiet waiting with an anxiousness to know the future.  As a young married dealing with five years of infertility was pure anguish.  And  now, here I am.  Blessed parenthood.  And I am stressed.

This opportunity for peace  is a welcome moment in our life.

Today I was hoping to bring our family to the Vigil.  Two sick children plus one husband who needs to study means our life got in the way of our plans.  We watched a bit of the vigil on EWTN and now I am keeping vigil at home by candlelight.

Lord, be with us.  Helps us to enter in.

I am going dark.  Stopping only to share our experience by blog.  We are adopting this (read #2) wonderful suggestion and will be dark until Easter Sunday.

Happy feast day to my wonderful brother in law and all our clergy!

From the Chrism Mass (the bishop addresses the people):
My brothers and sisters, pray for your priests.  Ask the Lord to bless them with the fullness of his love, to help them be faithful ministers of Christ the High Priest, so that they ill be able to lead you to him, the fountain of your salvation.  Lord Jesus Christ, hear us and answer our prayer.

the challenges of open adoption

I was asked to guest post next week on Foster2Forever about the benefits of open adoption.  I am not usually at a loss for words, but it has been a challenging post to compose.  I firmly believe in the benefits of open adoption.  The ironic part is we are in the middle of a challenging situation that will impact Catie's life.

Back in the summer we went through a court battle with bio-aunt and bio-uncle who were fighting for Catie to be theirs.  It was a very unique set of circumstances.  Ultimately, the county did not feel it was in her best interest.  Their lawyer essentially represented us (as county foster parents) to keep her.  I was asked to testify in front of biological parents and relatives about how we love Catie, how she reacts negatively following visits with the aunt and how she is thriving in our routine.  The judge made it very clear how important she felt the family connection was.  She had me stand up in the back of the court room and asked what I saw could work to allow Catie to maintain a relationship with her Aunt and Uncle.  I stated that I had once a month visits in mind.  The judge seemed to accept this and challenged the Aunt to accept this (who was clearly emotionally upset from the decision that Catie would not be theirs).  No visitation was ordered, essentially leaving degree of contact in our hands.

Since that time we have scheduled a once a month visit with the Aunt & Uncle.  I talk to the aunt on the phone.  It is a very brief conversation.  I drop Catie at the door (where the uncle picks her up).  The Uncle returns her to my house three hours later.  In 6 months, I have not physically seen the Aunt.

I asked to set up a breakfast meeting with the Aunt & Uncle.  Primary motivation, we don't know them.  They have not extended themselves to us or attempted to form a relationship with us.  Secondary motivation, to put the ball in their court for scheduling visits.

That breakfast meeting was this morning.

Bottom line, I do not feel comfortable with Catie having unsupervised visits in their home.  There are other members of the household whom I do not trust to be unsupervised with my daughter.  I KNOW that if I offer park visits, offer to come with Catie to supervise, etc etc, it is going to upset the aunt, who specifically wants unsupervised visits in her home.

But.  She is our daughter.  It is our job to protect her and keep her from harm.  I know that this will likely be the last we see or hear from the aunt (who after this morning still believes we are okay with monthly unsupervised visits).

We are taking this to prayer.  Truly seeking God's will.  Please pray with us for this situation.

stuck in the middle

Earlier this month Augie was diagnosed with Williams Syndrome. The diagnosis was based on facial characteristics and speech delays and personality consistent with the Syndrome.  It was an emotional week as I explained to friends and family and tried to wrap my brain around what this diagnosis would mean for Augie and our family.

And then a strange thing happened.  The first blood test came back negative.  My initial response was "praise God".  But this did not rule out WS.  WS is still a possibility.  SO, the problem now lies in how far do we go for a diagnosis.

Typical next step is a test called the microarray.  The genetic counselor is researching a next step of a test called gene sequencing (which my brother explains as trying to understand space travel back in the 50s).  Both tests are $$$. Quick estimate from a friend of the sequencing is >5k. 

So, now....How far do we go to confirm or rule out the diagnosis.  Current surveys (from a WS group on facebook) say do the microarray (CGH) to be sure.  I need to confirm cost and then decide our next step.  
Hypothetically, if we were to stop here...what assumptions do I make.  Does he or doesn't he?  I will keep you posted.

thankful for my mom

As a teenager, my mom was not my favorite person.  We clashed - big time.  College and beyond I was still working on finding and embracing MY identity.  I was not often seeking her opinion or approval.  In the early years of my marriage, my husband often played the role of peacemaker.  He helped me try to see the situation through her eyes.

And then...I had kids.  And then and forever, my opinion of my mom changed.

My mom raised my brother and I across the world from her family.  Growing up with a military dad also meant she raised us as a single parent for a good portion of the time.  I can barely handle one dinner without my husband's presence.  I have so much more respect for how she handled six months without my dad.

Every day I am a mom, I grow to appreciate her more.  I am thankful for her love through the years.  I am so grateful for the gift of faith that she passed on to me (especially while the rest of her family had given up their faith).  I am thankful for her sacrifices, her devotion...the blood, sweat and tears she poured out for us.  Most of all, I am thankful to have her in my life today and for our now wonderful relationship.  She is a great mom and a great mimi. Thanks for everything...love you mom.

Tulips at the beautiful Longwood Gardens

My mama

Thank goodness for the children's gardens

the invites are waiting to go out

This weekend we took a photographer with us to the museum to get some family pictures and some Catie pictures.  I was so excited I ordered invitations the same night as well as two family canvas pictures (it was bogo at easycanvasprints). 

Augie & Catie were a bit miserable, so I am really blessed we got some good ones.  Our favorite one, we were tying to keep the babies from screaming and were just throwing sticks in the stream.  Our photographer got us from across the stream.  I wrote the post and am dying to share that one!  A few more weeks and you can see our full family picture.

Six weeks, to be exact.  Six weeks until the adoption, baptism, party and pictures!

Why We Need Kid's at Mass

I just read an excellent article in the latest National Catholic Register. Why We Need Kid's at Mass. I am going to ask my pastor to consider publishing it in our bulletin.

And, for a tear jerker, check out Priest Ordained Early to Fulfill Father's  Wish.  I still get choked up thinking about the extra-ordinary circumstances of that story.  

Infertility Support, free webinar

Ave Maria Press is hosting a free webinar for those who may be interested in helping their parish or Diocese offer support for couples struggling with infertility. 

today in pictures

Picking itty bitty flowers for mama

Doing whatever his big sister does...but he sure is cute

Sneak Peak

German Chocolate Cupcakes for our beloved uncle kiki

my new neice

Congratulations to my brother and his wife as they welcome their 2nd child and my first niece, baby Taylor June!  

Mom holding grandbaby #5!

Welcome baby Taylor!

we have a date!

God has sent his love to me in a big way today.  *tearing as I write*

In addition to the most.beautiful.day.ever...today I received an adoption date!!  April 25th Catie will become officially and forever ours!!  (and then I can share pictures :)

20/20 Williams Syndrome Special

part 1:
Where Everybody Wants to Be Your Friend | Video - ABC News

part 2:
Sunny Personalities, Serious Consequences | Video - ABC News

diagnosed

Today my son was clinically diagnosed with Williams Syndrome.

A few weeks ago my brother, a medical student, mentioned that Augie had textbook characteristics.  I looked it up and was surprised.  Not only by the facial features, but the personality traits.  Primarily speech delays and super friendly, even to strangers.

From early on there have been things going on.  A mother's instinct, you could say.  The first month he was in our care we were at his Pediatrician four separate times.  Dx: bronchiolitis and pre-asthmatic.  He had these mini, mild (never-quite-diagnosed-as) seizures. Even today, I am not sure they were seizures...possibly temperature sensitivity (he wakes up cold and it takes him longer than usual to warm up, he is usually shivering during this time).  His forehead also had an unusual attraction to concrete.

If you look closely at this picture, it has been Photoshopped...along with many others, to attempt to conceal the bruisey head in otherwise cute pictures.  

We first met with a pediatric neurologist around his first birthday.  One tight heel cord led to two MRIs which led to two diagnoses: 1. Possible Tethered Cord (this is a mild form of Spina Bifida....I think this was a 'CYA' dx on the part of the radiologist, I don't think he has this, but it will be monitored over time).  2. Chiari 1 Malformation (an incidental finding that we are blessed to know in the event of future problems). 

Oh yeah...and as I mentioned before, speech delays.  He was in weekly OT from 6-18 months old at which point he qualified out.

So, in a nutshell, we have been hot on the trail of whatever THIS was for a while now.  The conversation with my brother was not a shocker.  It will take about two weeks for a confirmation by way of the genetic test.  But, as soon as we stepped into the geneticist's office, he was throwing out all these words and quickly confirmed the clinical diagnosis.

So, tonight, I read.  I research.  And the reality starts to sink in.

In my reading words like "mental retardation" and "adult day homes" stand out.  As do "shorter life expectancy" and "lack of social boundaries".  I am encouraged that he is highly functioning.  As a whole, he is doing so well.  He is a beautiful, amazing, sweet little boy.  He is my heart.  Tonight my heart hurts a little as I attempt to process what this means for his future.  He has a 50% chance of passing this on to his children (though many WS adults don't have the ability for lasting relationships).  That is one of a long list of what may lay ahead for an adult with WS.

So many random things are running through my head.
- I am grateful for the show Parenthood and processing the idea of life with a a special needs child.
- God intended us to be parents to special needs kids, before we even met Catie.
- I am glad I enrolled Rosie in pre-K to have some time to focus on the needs (and OT appointments) for the babies this upcoming year.
- I am grateful for a Catholic special needs school very near by, and that adoption subsidies would likely cover any cost involved.   

I am sad.  I want to cry.  This will impact our future...and certainly, obviously his.  I know there is undiscovered joy and greater meaning that will be revealed over time.  For now...we are processing.

Women's Health Care?

I first visited a gynecologist when I was a teenager.  I was having severe menstrual cramps.  The kind of severe that made me spend my senior prom in the ER.  Consequently, that gynecologist "solved" all of "our" problems by placing me on the birth control pill.  This was my first encounter with women's health care.  It is pretty consistent with the quality of health care most woman receive today.

If you have a problem..."Have WE got a pill for YOU!"

The birth control pill...otherwise known as the biggest band-aid known to woman kind.  The only problem, this band-aid causes cancer, strokes, infertility, and spontaneous abortion.

As a teen, I was put on the pill and instructed to take it without the water pills, thereby eliminating my period for two years...until I encountered a woman, a mentor, who urged me to discontinue immediately.  Praise God for her.  According to a Mayo clinic study " any young girl or woman who is on hormonal birth control for 4 years prior to their first full term pregnancy increases their breast cancer risk by 52%."  See
Jenn Grioux, Deadly Risks of the Pill.  

Years later, when my husband and I were dealing with infertility, we knew enough to avoid the band-aid approach.  We didn't want to just get pregnant, we wanted to restore my health.  IVF is the big fat "band-aid" of reproductive medicine.  And it is just about as safe as the Pill (read: sarcasm).

We were so lucky to break free from the traditional course of ineffective woman's health care and discover True Woman's Health Care...also known as FertilityCare.   Suddenly, there was a wealth of information.  My charts were telling the doctors there was something wrong.  My blood work revealed the same.  Ironically, so many women are told they are fine, but if they can't conceive, try IVF.  #1. They are not fine.  #2. IVF does nothing to correct the problems doctors are too lazy to find.

NaPro Technology offered me a "Disease Based Approach to Infertility."  I was treated for my problems.  My endometriosis was removed properly and my hormones were regulated (not bypassed).  For the first time my doctors treated me as a person, a whole person.  They treated me with dignity and nothing I was asked to do was outside of my moral beliefs.

I was so impressed that I became a Fertility Care Practitioner to share the information with others.  I look at Dr Hilgers Medical Textbook frequently and am so tempted to bop Ob/Gyns on the head with it.  Until NaPro Technology is taught as a standard in Med Schools, I will continue to refer women to drive however far it takes for authentic women's health care. 

Consequently, my NaPro treatment led to the miracle conception of my daughter...though NaPro success goes so far beyond conception.  I have worked with woman who have resolved all sorts of medical issues their local doctors would not treat or acknowledge.

This is a Blog Hop!  To share how Fertility Care has impacted your life or marriage, go to Blessed and Broken and add your story to the Hop.

FertilityCare Blog Hop

March 25-31st is World Wide FertilityCare Week.  In order to help raise awareness for the amazing gift of FertlityCare, I am sponsoring a Blog Hop.  I would love to hear how FertilityCare (Creighton Model or NaPro Technology) has impacted your life.

Instructions:
1. Compose a blog on your site about:
a. how FertilityCare (Creighton Model or NaPro Technology) has impacted your life
b. how the use of the FertilityCare System helps you to find the Perfect Balance in the Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Communicative and Emotional aspects of who you are (or in your marriage)
c. or anything related to share the word!

2. Copy the link to that blog post and come back here to fill out the linky form

3. Go Back to your blog and add the code to the bottom (you must be in Edit HTML) with the statement
"This is a Blog Hop!  To share how Fertility Care has impacted your life or marriage, go to Blessed and Broken and add your story to the Hop."  

This Blog Hop will open March 1st and close March 31st.  I look forward to reading your blogs!