"Reclaim your Joy"

This is what the Lord spoke to me tonight in adoration.

I thought I was driving to bible study but since it study was cancelled on account of the holiday, it ended up being "date night with Jesus."  It was kind of like when you are dating and your boyfriend does something really cool to surprise you.  Monday night. I am sitting at the Church parking lot and Jesus was waiting for me inside.  "Surprise!"

I LOVED THAT!  When I walked in, the only other person in the chapel walked out.  I was alone before the Lord in the Blessed Sacrament.  I think He planned this.  :)

I prayed for you!!  By name I prayed for everyone who has requested prayers, newly had a baby, newly adopted, painfully waiting.  You were all on my heart.  I prayed three fervent Hail Marys for my brother in law.  I prayed for my in laws.  I prayed for my family.

Intercessory prayer led me deeper and the Lord started talking.  I had a couple of things I was looking for inspiration on:
1. Living Out Lent night for women I am running next month
2. Theology of the Body retreat that I am doing with teen girls
3. Personal life, prayer life, etc.

I believe I have a theme for #1 "Lead Me to the Cross" and I ended up reading the Crucifixion accounts in all four gospels to see the role of women at the cross. 

I hope God can rock the girl's socks off for #2.  I was contemplating how a teenage girl could live "Free, Total, Faithful and Fruitful."  Cool stuff!  I am also so psyched about this opportunity and totally bringing "Rosie" dressed up in princess garb to remind the girls of when we all truly believed we were princesses.   

#3.  God led me to a verse.  Psalm 13.  My bible practically fell open to it.  I actually had a pencil resting in the page.  Surprise surprise.  Ummm, so I totally forgot, but this is the SAME VERSE God sent me to the last time I was in adoration.  I think He was trying to make a point!  Underlined, circled and verse that is going on my kitchen window: "Grant my heart JOY in your help."

I LOVE the word Joy.  At an Unbound conference in the Spring I was blessed to receive the Father's blessing via Neal Lozano.  His prayer was about the blessing of my name, Elisabeth and how during Mary's visit to Elizabeth the infant lept in her womb (for joy).  The blessing was for joy within me.  During adoration tonight I felt the Lord urging me to "reclaim joy in (my) life."  Lately, as a wife and mother I am more tired and less enthusiastic.  So, I am holding on to this new blessing and will be seeking my JOY.

Finally, my marching orders for the Month (from this post).
S (spiritual) - offer up my little sufferings for my husband
P (physical) - morning exercises with the kids
I (intellectual) - read one book, any book, this month
C (creative/communicative) - to try to have post-bedtime (=kids in bed) dinner with my husband 1x week
E (emotional) - speak words of affirmation to fill hubby's love tank

The SPICE it up Challenge

For those out there who have learned Creighton, you know about SPICE. This stands for the Spiritual, Physical, Intellectual, Creative/Communicative and Emotional/psychological needs of your spouse.  The talking point is "while genital contact is to be avoided during the days of fertility, if your intention is to avoid pregnancy, "sexual" contact (SPICE - the broader concept of relationship) should never be avoided."  In other words, be extra willing to work on your marriage in other departments during times of abstinence.

One of my favorite parts of teaching CrM is facilitating the SPICE discussion. Probably about 90% of the time I end up recommending the book "The 5 Love Languages."  I will offer more on this in my next post.

When we first learned Creighton (and SPICE) it was the in midst of our struggle with infertility.  Avoiding pregnancy was not a concern.  In the wise words of my practitioner, couples dealing with infertility have to work just as hard, if not harder at their relationship. We were encouraged to make a list of 10 non-genital ways we could show love to our spouse, and then compare notes. At that time, we did all that we were asked, but I never fully brought SPICE into our marriage.

I am blogging this topic tonight as I am in need of a refresher course.  I am so blessed by my marriage of 9 years.  I could not ask for a better spouse or partner in life.  That said, is SO easy to be consumed by busyness, children, responsibilities...life, and forget the needs of your spouse.

Helpmate.  I am called to be a helpmate.  The etymology of the word, specifically points to Genesis 2:28, God's creation of woman to be a helper for man.  Most online dictionaries refer to helpmate as "specifically: wife". 

Spinning off from Magnify the Lord's Marriage Monday posts, for myself I am starting the SPICE it up challenge.  My prayer and goal this week is to have an understanding heart.  It is so easy to expect/demand help at the end of a long day.  Yet, at that time, I am the one called to be a helpmate (my love...if you are reading....I will do my best).

I am a fan of SPICE...but how has it impacted my marriage?  I can not ask others to do what I am not.

This week I shall:
 
S - pray for my husband daily
P - daily embrace initiated by me "just because"
I - 5 Love Language Assessment (more in a future post)
C - do the dishes joyfully
E - sit down with my husband when he arrives home & converse about the day