on communication & the faith

My mother has long told me that she admired my husband's and my ability to communicate.  We are certainly not experts...but the longer I reside in adulthood, the more I realize how communication, especially between spouses, is an incredible gift...and one that is essential to practice & nurture.

I grew up in an extended family that did everything to avoid important or personal conversations.  There were lots of surface conversations,  lots of trying not to offend and  lots of dark secrets,  How do I know this all?  Because my mom rebelled against that mold.  She was a confidant to many and perhaps the only one who practiced faith as an adult.  I think these two are related.  Christ teaches us how to be a friend.

When I married into my husbands' family I saw the differences.  Within their extended family, there are many political & religious differences (same as mine), but these are often topics of family conversation.  I admire families that can respectfully engage in challenging conversation.

As Christians we are called, challenged, even required to share of our faith.  For someone who loves Christ, what she wants most is to share Him, especially with those she loves most.  However, in a family that does not communicate...this is a great challenge.  I have extended family that are not only not Christian, some are anti-Christian.  I love them.  They are my family.  I struggle with feeling judged...this feeling is rooted in pride.  But the hardest is the name calling.  When someone I love resorts to name calling, that is where respect goes out the window.  And that is my opportunity to unite my little sufferings to Christ, who was called all kinds of names...and still died for those who hated Him.

How can we grow if we are not challenged?  If everyone is to sit happily in their little bubbles and never be questioned, challenged or even called out....how do we become better human beings?  I am so grateful for the priest who had the courage to challenge my in the confessional.  I am on the road to becoming a better mother as a result of his challenge.  I am also encouraging my husband to call me out when he sees me falling short.  It is hard for him....I can't guarantee my response will be charitable....but we have to be able to help one another in our life's journey.  

We have to take risks in life.  Sometimes this means taking risks in family or with those we love.  Perhaps, this is one of the most challenging calls of Christianity...at least for me.  We love them, we accept them and ultimately we live by example.

But who are we as Christians if we are too afraid to invite them to join us in this incredible, blessed life?  

While I can blog about this...please don't mistake that for being a stellar apologist.  As Christians we should also be able to challenge one another....and this is so hard!  It starts with recognizing in my own life how far I am from the goal.  And in my weakness, I pray Christ can use me for the good of those I love.   

God, give us the courage to live & die for you.  Amen.