An Infertility Retreat

I am so thrilled that the website is finally up!!

http://www.fertilitycarefriends.org/hoperetreat.html

THIS is the resource page for information on the Infertility Retreat that I have been working on long and hard with a dear friend and practitioner from Harrisburg.

If you are close and interested, feel free to contact me. If you are far and interested, you are welcome!! We need lots of prayer support for a powerful weekend orchestrated by the Holy Spirit. Please join me in praying!

Homestudy Rescheduled

So, the last couple days have been a bit of a slump, as in nothing is going on in our process of moving closer to fostering. I know this will resolve soon and I am sure the next couple of months will be gone in a flash. For now, we are just waiting.

The night before our almost homestudy, Paul and I had a wonderful talk about fostering. What will our lives be like with another child in the house? How will H react? Paul tossed around the ways he can be more present at home (while I assured him how much the 2nd job is needed right now). We are back in that "how do you prepare for the unknown" phase. At least, having had an infant a few short years ago, we are good on the gear and basic necessities.

The monthly financial commitment to fertility medications is starting to become a little much. So we face the prospect of letting go of that journey for a bit. To be honest, I am always quick to volunteer shedding the shots and pills. It is disappointing that the birth of our first child did not miraculously resolve our infertility, as many first births often do. However, we trust in God's greater plan. As of now, the difference from our first adoption attempt, is if we are so blessed to conceive in the process of fostering, we won't be forced to quit the process.

Next week we start training classes. Two weeks from that, we will prepare for the home visit again. I was blessed to speak to someone yesterday who adopted three before miraculously conceiving two. They are a beautiful family and adoption advocates. She lifted my spirits by sharing stories of several friends blessed by the foster to adopt program. My prayer is 6 to 12 months from now I will be looking back at the beginning of the year and seeing how much has changed.

My Beautiful, Wonderful, CRAZY miracle

Here is a video of the most wonderful, crazy child that God could ever give us (so far :)

Our Foster Care Timeline

Tuesday morning we had our initial visit with the social worker - she was wonderful! We scheduled our next appointment (start of home study) for this coming Tuesday. I have been working to complete the application and collect some of the necessary paperwork. We should start our 5 weeks of training Wed, Jan 20th (ending on Ash Wednesday).

I know the training and home study have to be wrapped up before we can receive a placement. I asked our social worker about typically how long before placement. She said it could be that day (she could be finishing home study paperwork for us to receive placement) or it could be a couple weeks or a couple months. We are open to any child younger than H and placement of any race (the latter which could mean an earlier placement).

It is seeming more real and crazy to think of being back in this process. I have started praying for the child that will be coming into our home, where ever they are.

what lies ahead

First, Merry Christmas!! We are so grateful to have Paul's family up from FL and have had a lovely, relaxing visit. I wish all a wonderful Christmas season!

Infertility round 2. I can't say this was unexpected. Yet that fact does not make it easier. We long to grow our family and month after month we face the reality of our infertility. We are fast approaching 6 months past our surgery date. It does not take long for me to grow weary or pills and shots and blood work and consults.

Fortunately, our previous adoption experience has make it significantly easier to fast track back into the process. This time, we are choosing the foster to adopt program. In reality...we are choosing foster care (with the hope of adoption as an end goal). We have submitted our application. Our initial interview is in January and soon thereafter we hope to begin the 5 week course of training.

It is a little scary and a lot of unknown. I am re-entering the blogging world for the same reason I created the blog in the first place...to keep family and friends updated in our hopes to expand our family. Please keep us in your prayers.

Tis the Season for Squash!!

I am having a wonderful fall of dining on local yummy squash (and some from our garden).

Tonight we made Acorn Squash soup, using this recipe. Delicious! A lovely warm soup, almost reminiscent of a light pea soup (but worth trying for pea soup haters), with just a touch of heat - depending on how much cayenne you use.

With the flesh from a fairytale pumpkin I made pumpkin biscotti following this recipe, plus added some pecans. This was my first attempt at biscotti. I made it for a party I was attending that evening. My only wish is that I had more time to allow them to dry to the perfect crunch. But even fresh, still very yummy!

Of course we had several batches of spaghetti squash, buttered with Parmesan cheese, after growing them in our garden.

I tried a few things from a new cookbook, Deceptively Delicious. Baked Egg Puffs with pumpkin (from the can). Someone else already blogged about them. At the same time we had Oatmeal with pumpkin, which fortunately again, someone else has blogged the recipe. Paul preferred the oatmeal...it was a little too pumpkin-y for me. I preferred the egg puffs. Next time I try the egg puffs I will probably use the recommended yellow or butternut squash puree. For the oatmeal, I would try that with sweet potato (the recommended alternative to pumpkin).

AND, my favorite so far in this Squashy Season, Butternut Lentil Soup using this as my base recipe. Unfortunately, I did modify it a bit and have no memory of what I did. But I am sure the original recipe is still very good. :)

Hope this helps at least one person have some....good eats, yuk yuk yuk. And to my buddy Scott, I will never forget your famous butternut squash soup with cheese ravioli (which I have made several times since PFL). One of my first introductions to squash dining.

Seriously? On Obama's Peace Prize award

Alright, here is the thing. I just have to remind myself that the Nobel awards are given by a foundation of worldy people. Obviously our world today has quite a screwed up definition of Peace.

From LifeSite News
In his will, Swedish industrialist and inventor Alfred Nobel said the Peace Prize is meant to be awarded "to the person who shall have done the most or the best work for fraternity between nations, for the abolition or reduction of standing armies and for the holding and promotion of peace congresses."

Yet, at the time (of his nomination) the only bridge building Obama had done with other countries is to take tens of millions of taxpayer funds and give them to abortion businesses like Planned Parenthood and Marie Stopes International.

Those groups would use the funds to not only perform abortions but lobby the pro-life governments of nations in places like South America and Africa to overturn their laws.

Mother Theresa has stated "The greatest threat to world peace is abortion." Also, Pope Benedict released a very similar statement on the World Day of Peace in 2006. “Respect for people promotes peace,” the pope said in the statement as he stressed “the duty to respect the dignity of each and every person."

Unfortunately, our world doesn't quite "get" many things. The Peace prize of course was given to Al Gore two years ago for his "work" on Climate Change. Until we correct our screwed up priorities and recognize every conceived human life as sacred and full of every hope for the future, I will likely continue to curse the Nobel foundation.

Happy Birthday Baby!!

It is so hard to believe our beautiful girl is two. I read her birth story the other night at dinner. Sniff Sniff. She has grown so fast!

My Nephew

SR arrived by c-section on August 30th. Mom, Dad and S are doing well (after quite a laboring ordeal). H spent the day singing happy birthday to Simon and cheering for him and Aunt Meagan.

Summer Fun

Here are a few pictures of our summer fun - just in time for Fall!
I tried hard and long, but still can't get the captions to work out.

1. Pool time with Papa and Uncle Keith
2. A sprinkler playdate
3 & 4 - Backyard fun with cousin K
5. Potty training together with cousin G
6. Puzzels with god-sister C
7. My big girl who still thinks she can take a bath in the sink. :)

NaPro Surgery #3

Just a quick update,
surgery lasted 4.5 hours. Grade 2 endo, adhesions, some kind of stem thing?? He removed 95% of it. Recovery lasted 4 more hours than I was expecting (5 total hours) and they didn't do as good a job managing my anesthesia nausea - that I warned them about.

Dr Stegman is amazing. As a surgeon, I adore him. He prayed with me a quite extensive prayer before surgery, entrusting me to Mary, praying for St Gerard's intercession. Very moving. I also asked/begged him to please get whatever you can get as I don't think I could do the laparotomy again. I am grateful he did because it would be shear misery waking up after a 20 min surgery again.

Dr Hilgers had put a gortex sheath on my uterus which didn't stay in place to do it's job. Therefore I have a crumpled piece of gortex that remains around the bottom of my uterus (Dr S couln't do anything laprascopically about it).

Recovery is much rougher than I was expecting. I am so grateful for friends that have stepped in (with no warning) to watch H and provide meals. I was not anticipating being "under the knife" again so soon (3 years). I will try to provide more thoughts at a future (non drug induced) blog. :)

More Coffee equals more blogging

So it is 11:47pm as I start this. Tomorrow, our family schedule says 8am Daily Mass. I need to go to bed, but I started perusing blogs. It reminded me, I should start sending a little more love out to the blogworld.

We had my cousin (goddaughter) and her family over for dinner tonight. It was a baptism anniversary dinner (thanks Steve & Becky for the idea). Time flies and I can't believe it has been 12 years since I first became a godmother. We were also blessed to have her stay with us for two days as a live in babysitter. I highly recommend 12 year old's for stressed out moms!

So tomorrow is 2 days till B day. I joked on facebook that my autobiography should be called "Inside My Bellybutton." This is my 3rd reconstructive bellybutton surgery. I hope they get it right this time! :)

Is anyone still reading?? :)

I am sorry my blogging has slowed down quite dramatically. As H grows (and no thanks to face book) my updates have been very infrequent.

So here is an update:
H is a big girl in training! She has been using her little potty quite successfully for the last two weeks. We started by eliminating pants and diapers a few weeks ago (a benefit of having hardwood floors). She figured it out pretty quickly and especially loves her m&m reward. We have started to incorporate big girl panties and pull ups...and the last couple days she is doing really well staying dry! I love the decrease in diaper laundry. It is great!

In the pursuit of #2....we have surgery scheduled in two weeks. This will be my 4th (but 1st in round 2). Secondary infertility stinks. I was amazed how fast all the infertility feelings flooded back. BUT, having H in our lives is an INCREDIBLE blessing. While I go up and down on the IF roller coaster (again) knowing we have H makes everything a little bit easier.

St Gerard, St Gianna, John Paul II - pray for us!

Powerful Story of an Abortion Survivor

I urge everyone to watch this phenomenal testimony of abortion survivor, Gianna Jessen.

Camping in Deleware

Paul's request for Father's day was to go camping in Deleware. We went to Cape Henlopen....a wonderful place. I only managed to get about 10 minutes of good beach time (when we first arrived) but we still had a great time. The taste of yummy blue crabs still lingers!

Our Square Foot Garden!

So we have finally built and planted our square foot garden! Here are the basic plans (though they have changed slightly because I had forgotten a few additions. Within our 2 4'X12' beds we have 96 squares; In which we are growing:
4 tomato plants
48 Onions
16 Garlic
2 Cucumber plants
32 Sugar Snap Peas
32 Shell Peas
32 Bush Beans
8 Pole Beans
1 Zucchini
1 Yellow Squash
1 Accorn suash
1 Spaghetti squash
3 Butternut
32 Scallions
2 Green Pepper plants
2 green/red pepper plants
1 banana pepper plant
4 Broccoli
64 Carrots
4 Edamame (soy bean plants)
4 Cabbage
16 Mesculin Lettuce Mix
16 Romaine Lettuce
16 Kale
16 Spinach

and I think we are still adding 3 cantaloupe in there too.








We also planted an herb garden and strawberry/melon patch on our back patio!

Ave Maria, and goosebumps

I just recalled this awesome youtube video on a friend's blog. I thought I would post it here in case any one hasn't seen yet. This is Bobby McFerrin (Don't Worry, Be Happy).

Camping Time Again!

With a gorgeous weekend forecast, we jumped town and went camping.
It was wonderful. Except for the lack of sleep the first night. And the lack of nap the second day. You can see, though, we sufficiently tuckered H out for the second night. :) (and naps for the rest of the week...see evidence under the library book). We also got to attempt kite flying. Of course the wind didn't show up until we were leaving.

H is growing and changing so much, still. She continues to keep us in stitches. She loves to give kisses European style (back and forth from cheek to cheek). She is getting very good at potty training her baby doll (including singing the potty song to her) - while she still does not have much interest in learning herself. We are trying to learn some Disney characters for our summer trip. So far it is Winny the "poop" or Winny "pee-uuuuu." She also loves to use that sound in reference to her own diapers (learned from mama). She still loves to help empty the dishwasher and tells us "thank chew" as she hands us silverware. If I am not paying attention "mamma, mamma, thank chew." She is learning new words all the time, but it still can be quite difficult interpreting. My favorite thing is to listen to her sing the alphabet with me. She picks up lots of letters and is just adorable singing.

We discovered that H is not the fulfillment of our desire for children...but a taste of just how sweet it is to be parents. We long for more of this goodness...and while we wait, we savor our amazing little gift.

Easter Egg Hunting and entertaining

Today was our first Easter egg hunt. Despite the hundreds of people and the fact that even the 1-2 year old age bracket was quite competitive, it was adorable to watch H fill her basket (carried ever so adorably like a little purse).





Off topic...here are pictures of two recent accomplishments.

The Inside-Out German chocolate cake I made (painstakingly) for my brother-in-law's birthday.













And my table from our Progessive Dinner. We hosted a Chinese dinner, I made my mom's sweet and sour pork stir fry and I thought the table looked adorable! (It is so fun to entertain!!)

The Things that Buy Me Time

It is amazing what a toddler can do with 5 minutes...or 30 seconds for that matter.

Exhibit A: I was desperate for sleep. H got a hold of my Creighton Chart and stickers. I did not find this until I started noticing little stickers on her clothes, the dog, the floor. Then I found my chart.

Exhibit B: One of the many famous empty the toilet paper scenes.

Exhibit C: Just now, H discovered that a pen can do wonders for your skin!