Thursday, June 24, 2010
silly side note
about the new blog, Paul mentioned the fields looked quite fertile. hmmm....not appropriate? Well, I think they are prettier than the desert pictures. Hope wins this time buddy.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
inch by inch
"Cousin Love"
My parents were in town this weekend. We were able to spend Father's day with my parents and my Sister in law's family. It was wonderful for our daughter and foster son to get some cousin time. H is 2 years older than her cousin and SBR is 3 months younger. Not living close to my nephew it was sheer joy getting to see how much he has grown. He looks so much like my brother and makes the funniest grunting/laugh sounds. H had so much fun pushing her cousin on the swing and my sister in law overheard H say "he's my boy."
Meanwhile, SBR has won over my family. I am sure they are in love. We are going to my brother's wedding this weekend. SBR is coming along as family, of course. Apart from a baptism, this will be the first big event where we are introducing him. I know he will win everyone's hearts with the killer smile that he uses all the time. I was wondering what questions I may get this weekend. On quick reflection, I have actually already fielded questions such as "how on earth could you ever do that?" and heard numerous foster care horror stories. But so far our extended family is awesome and supportive about this.
And just a post script, every day he makes his way just a little deeper in my heart. Right now I would say we have a love love relationship...it helps when he is sleeping through the night! At one point I spent a few hours day dreaming about possible names, but I had to stop and decided to try not to be adoption minded until the courts are clearly adoption minded. Our next court date is in October and I know the next 4 months will reveal a LOT.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
click Refresh
It is crazy to think I have been blogging for 4 years. So much has changed. We started this to keep family updated on our adoption process. Then, it became the place to share news and updates about our miracle conception. Then, the proud new mommy blog. Then, secondary infertility blog which lead to the foster care parent blog. Amazingly enough, the title still applies. We are still striving to grow our family and happy to have this place to share updates of the more personal, journaling type nature.
Blogspot was offering new templates, so I am opting to try to stay fresh and update this space just a bit. Hopefully a new look will encourage more blogging. :)
Blogspot was offering new templates, so I am opting to try to stay fresh and update this space just a bit. Hopefully a new look will encourage more blogging. :)
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
"Is he adopted?"
Tonight we went to a kid's picnic at our parish. The daughter of a friend came up as I was holding our chunk and asked "is he adopted?" I put her off because we were about the pray grace and she wondered off sparing me from explaining. How do you explain fostering to a child?
I love this little kid. That said...he is teething right now. My husband reminds me we had these very same frustrations with H. It is difficult to love any child when you have been up all night four nights in a row. Yet, I can't deny how totally different it is from #1 (biological) to #2 (foster). We meet his needs, feed him like crazy, burp, clean diapers, and on and on. We love on him, cuddle, snuggle and play. The biggest difference is perhaps that we are not doing attachment parenting with "SBR". I always forget to bring my slings out, I have never felt co-sleeping was an option for us (whereas it was the natural development with H); And it is much easier to pass him to a stranger for babysitting - because there are no b--bs involved. Yet, I am still more of his mama than his mama is. We would 1000 percent be elated for the opportunity to keep him forever. I think everything else just boils down to being guarded.
This week was the first week that I felt a "look" from him when I passed him off at his parent visit. He has the sweetest eyes - which happen to be a little bit clogged and therefore a little bit moist...all the time. I know we have A bond. I just always question - how much, and wonder if it is enough. Before too long he will start to reach for me, as mama. It feels like a long way off until October (our next court date). But the days go fast enough. So we just wait. And hope that the next time I get that question, "is he adopted?" I can simply say "yes!"
I love this little kid. That said...he is teething right now. My husband reminds me we had these very same frustrations with H. It is difficult to love any child when you have been up all night four nights in a row. Yet, I can't deny how totally different it is from #1 (biological) to #2 (foster). We meet his needs, feed him like crazy, burp, clean diapers, and on and on. We love on him, cuddle, snuggle and play. The biggest difference is perhaps that we are not doing attachment parenting with "SBR". I always forget to bring my slings out, I have never felt co-sleeping was an option for us (whereas it was the natural development with H); And it is much easier to pass him to a stranger for babysitting - because there are no b--bs involved. Yet, I am still more of his mama than his mama is. We would 1000 percent be elated for the opportunity to keep him forever. I think everything else just boils down to being guarded.
This week was the first week that I felt a "look" from him when I passed him off at his parent visit. He has the sweetest eyes - which happen to be a little bit clogged and therefore a little bit moist...all the time. I know we have A bond. I just always question - how much, and wonder if it is enough. Before too long he will start to reach for me, as mama. It feels like a long way off until October (our next court date). But the days go fast enough. So we just wait. And hope that the next time I get that question, "is he adopted?" I can simply say "yes!"
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