As this season of advent approaches it is a time of preparation I teach my 8th grade CCD students. Some of them get it and others look surprised. Its kind of funny. This year I was one of the surprised ones. It hard to believe that it is already this time of year. Getting so wrapped up in work and estimates and Elisabeth's new job and normal responsibilities the idea that this is a time of preparation slipped my mind. We are supposed to be preparing our homes and our hearts for the arrival of a baby. A king is promised to come. One who will bring peace to the world and to us individually. Although Christmas time may come and Go I am choosing this advent to prepare my mind and heart for a baby that is promised. One that will be ours. Maranatha Come Lord Jesus and See the blessing you have created for us some where.
May your Advent be a fruitful one and may the Lord's coming fill your home with Joy.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
An EXCELLENT article on Infertility
Dear Family & Friends,
PLEASE READ THIS!!!! Someone on my infertility board posted a link to this article. It is, perhaps, the most comprehensive and honest look at what we go through. I hope that it brings you insight on the struggle of Infertilty. God Bless You All & Happy Thanksgiving!
PLEASE READ THIS!!!! Someone on my infertility board posted a link to this article. It is, perhaps, the most comprehensive and honest look at what we go through. I hope that it brings you insight on the struggle of Infertilty. God Bless You All & Happy Thanksgiving!
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Adoptive Search Panel
So, last night I was on my own to attend the Search panel discussion (while Paul was teaching). This is where we hear from "the triad." The triad consists of the adoptive parent(s), adopted child and birthparent(s). The search panel consists of one of each of these that have searched and found someone in the last couple years.
The first was an adoptive parent. Her son sought and found his birthmother when he turned 18. Since her son was 7 when he was adopted he did have a memory of his birthmother. In this case the mother and the birthmother formed a friendship and now refer to him as "our son" and joke about how he has two mothers. There always seems to be one case that is a little over the top.
The second was a daughter and birthfather that were reunited last year. This case was unique because it is very rare that a birthfather will keep the agency updated hoping to one day reunite with his child. Hearing from this man gave good insight. He was 15 when his daughter was born. His parents wanted to adopt and raise the baby - he was the one who talked everyone into giving the baby up for adoption. He was very respectful to the desires of the parents - to wait until their daughter turned 18 for her to search. She wanted to wait until she was out of college. Now they both speak of the relationship, the challenges and brought thoughts such as what happens after the reunion. Hearing from the daughter really helped me see that her parents are her parents, regardless of what happened with the search. She also helped me see that some degree of openness (letters, pictures) is not a bad thing. She didn't have any of that and said it has been overwhelming trying to learn names and relationships in her new extended family.
Also, the idea of the fact that the child is going to want to search was addressed. It is not a bad thing. It seems to just be a necessary, "finding oneself" right of passage for a child that is adopted. Even though a percentage of reunions never happen, or rejection may occur, the child will know and have closure on that part of their life.
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On another note...I just accepted a new job as the Director of Campus Ministry for a catholic high school. I am thrilled to finally have the opportunity to do what I want (full time ministry) - but nervous as to how the adoption will play into this change. I know God has this plan that is slowly unrolling. It is just difficult to see directly in front of you when you want to know the big picture. Hopefully the job will be a good distraction from the wait.
The first was an adoptive parent. Her son sought and found his birthmother when he turned 18. Since her son was 7 when he was adopted he did have a memory of his birthmother. In this case the mother and the birthmother formed a friendship and now refer to him as "our son" and joke about how he has two mothers. There always seems to be one case that is a little over the top.
The second was a daughter and birthfather that were reunited last year. This case was unique because it is very rare that a birthfather will keep the agency updated hoping to one day reunite with his child. Hearing from this man gave good insight. He was 15 when his daughter was born. His parents wanted to adopt and raise the baby - he was the one who talked everyone into giving the baby up for adoption. He was very respectful to the desires of the parents - to wait until their daughter turned 18 for her to search. She wanted to wait until she was out of college. Now they both speak of the relationship, the challenges and brought thoughts such as what happens after the reunion. Hearing from the daughter really helped me see that her parents are her parents, regardless of what happened with the search. She also helped me see that some degree of openness (letters, pictures) is not a bad thing. She didn't have any of that and said it has been overwhelming trying to learn names and relationships in her new extended family.
Also, the idea of the fact that the child is going to want to search was addressed. It is not a bad thing. It seems to just be a necessary, "finding oneself" right of passage for a child that is adopted. Even though a percentage of reunions never happen, or rejection may occur, the child will know and have closure on that part of their life.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On another note...I just accepted a new job as the Director of Campus Ministry for a catholic high school. I am thrilled to finally have the opportunity to do what I want (full time ministry) - but nervous as to how the adoption will play into this change. I know God has this plan that is slowly unrolling. It is just difficult to see directly in front of you when you want to know the big picture. Hopefully the job will be a good distraction from the wait.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Reproductive Medicine & Catholicism
Yesterday there was an article published in the Washington Post about NaPro Technology and Dr. Hilger's work with the Pope Paul VI Institute. Read the article by clicking here. The only argument from the Institute was that it was published in the religion section rather than the health & medicine section. While we were pursuing treatment with Dr. Hilgers there were concerns because we were pursuing "catholic" treatment. No, we were pursuing morally acceptable treatment.
Overall, the article is pretty balanced. Of course there are some ridiculous comments: "They might as well be advocating prayer for infertility," said Richard Paul, a fertility expert at the University of Southern California. "The reason that this is dangerous is because women have a biological clock, and while they are using up time with less effective therapies, time may run out." Though we are not (yet) in the statistical success rating, I think it would be quite difficult to find a woman who considers her treatment a waste of time.
I am glad to know that it is causing a little controversy out there. For two reasons, 1) if there is controversy others will know about it. 2) I would love to have other people studying & challenging the research. Really, their success and patient load should be saying something to mainstream docs. Please spread word of this article!
Overall, the article is pretty balanced. Of course there are some ridiculous comments: "They might as well be advocating prayer for infertility," said Richard Paul, a fertility expert at the University of Southern California. "The reason that this is dangerous is because women have a biological clock, and while they are using up time with less effective therapies, time may run out." Though we are not (yet) in the statistical success rating, I think it would be quite difficult to find a woman who considers her treatment a waste of time.
I am glad to know that it is causing a little controversy out there. For two reasons, 1) if there is controversy others will know about it. 2) I would love to have other people studying & challenging the research. Really, their success and patient load should be saying something to mainstream docs. Please spread word of this article!
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